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The Amazing Love
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畢泠 江山如畫
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| 發帖人 主題標題： | The Amazing Love 回覆數: 11 點數: 607 | 第 1 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-10 08:51
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The Amazing Love 摘自 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-10 08:51 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl 大家好！ 這張圖畫很讓人感動！感謝寒鴉詞長的分享。 請大家一起來分享自己的感想 .... 看圖題詩之一：The Amazing Love [img:c47e2ef520]http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0WQDvAjAb6t*u3*ScXbJfY1jFZiG2tfTh3ChYI8uiaZOLanbx4yhiVodZEu3JXZyWeseuC9PowuijJzrXeAZhJY7ys!0*xN3Ub6*bb6yQYERSmNBlEfBvWGL2g!d1ADYLnPR2DVvDeeQ/the%20heart.jpg?dc=4675508166073365161[/img:c47e2ef520] .... 天下文壇 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-10 08:51 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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漢語在線 ~ 迴風小築 ~ 相逢即有緣，給您最大的祝福 ... |
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| 回覆： | 遣思...說不上是首詩,沒押韻 | 第 2 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-11 20:59
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遣思...說不上是首詩,沒押韻 摘自 天下文壇 子雁 2005-01-11 20:59 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl The Amazing Love As the clouds searching in the air, The water empties its sleeves; The sun has no words to tell, Fixing the core, not leaving alone. It was the voice of the solitude, Deepening the sea's original soul; Transcending, mirroring, then both found, The blessed, Amazing Love! 天下文壇 天下文壇 子雁 2005-01-11 20:59 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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| 回覆： | 回子雁 | 第 3 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-12 02:39
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回子雁 摘自 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-12 02:39 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl 子雁詞長好！ 您的小詩很輕巧，挺好的，一些建議給您參考。 1) 劍橋字典連結給妳參考。 --- http://dictionary.cambridge.org/define.asp?key=94560&dict=CALD 2) Descending 通常用在負面的狀況 多，既是 Praise，換個字，用 transcend 會更好。 3) 請參考置頂工具書、有用網站連結，有音韻查詢的資料，應該是 rymer.com。找到了： --- http://www.rhymer.com/ 4) 韻字如 interlude, delude, elude, attitude .... 都可以參考。Aware, glare, fare .... ............................................................................................... The Amazing Love As the clouds searching in the air, [color=blue:3239402462]The water empty its sleeves; [/color:3239402462]... 這句很漂亮但不適合在這裡，可以再做其他的詩, [color=blue:3239402462] empties [/color:3239402462] The sun has no words to tell, Fixing the core, not leaving alone. [color=blue:3239402462]It was the voice of the solitude, [/color:3239402462]... 這句很漂亮 Deepening the sea's original mind; Descending, mirroring, then both found, The blessed, Amazing Love! 把您的詩再多念幾遍，讓整個意念與構思結合，確定您要的，再重整一下。 :P 伴和參考： [color=blue:3239402462]As the clouds wondering in air, Sky and sea, she tries to compare. The Sun has no words to tell, Fixing the cord, he did it swell![/color:3239402462] [color=brown:3239402462]As the clouds searching for wonder, Sky's or Sea's, she tries to capture. The sun seals the lights to his favored. The heart of love was entered![/color:3239402462] [color=blue:3239402462]It was the voice of the solitude, Tempting the eagerness to elude, Transcending, mirroring, then bounding. How the blessed, Love is Amazing![/color:3239402462] 也可參考的句子... Fixing the cord, wishing it swell! Fixing the cord, wishing it to swell! Transcending, mirroring, then touching, ( or Bounding, reaching ... ) ...................................................................................... The Amazing Love As the clouds searching in the air, The water empty its sleeves; The sun has no words to tell, Fixing the core, not leaving alone. It was the voice of the solitude, Deepening the sea's original mind; Descending, mirroring, then both found, The blessed, Amazing Love! :arrow: 天下文壇 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-12 02:39 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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漢語在線 ~ 迴風小築 ~ 相逢即有緣，給您最大的祝福 ... |
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| 回覆： | 第 4 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-12 11:45
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摘自 天下文壇 輕輕 2005-01-12 11:45 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl 子雁，詩可以不押韻~ 天下文壇 天下文壇 輕輕 2005-01-12 11:45 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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| 回覆： | 第 5 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-14 11:06
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摘自 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-14 11:06 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl 子雁詞長好！ 上面的貼文漏了提，詩有沒有押韻都沒關係，您可以選擇。 列出來給妳參考的，因為您提到沒押韻，以為您有興趣，所以，提供了些資訊，也和詩給您參考。 另外，也感謝輕輕詞長給您做的補充。 如前之貼文，把握住心中的情感，把您的詩再多念幾遍，讓整個意念與構思結合， 確定您要的，重整與否您自己參考，不要有壓力。 學習是自己的，時間可以自己定。 --- 祝福 --- .... 天下文壇 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-14 11:06 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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漢語在線 ~ 迴風小築 ~ 相逢即有緣，給您最大的祝福 ... |
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| 回覆： | 第 6 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-14 11:41
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摘自 天下文壇 秋靈 2005-01-14 11:41 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl 很漂亮的圖，像哪兒見過？ 天下文壇 天下文壇 秋靈 2005-01-14 11:41 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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若問今生情何似，潔出塵泥一朵蓮。 |
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| 回覆： | 第 7 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-14 23:50
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摘自 天下文壇 寒鴉 2005-01-14 23:50 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl 大家好！ 這是從一位詩詞文友網上〞摘〞下的． 感動！也支持著我久久．．天上人間 祝大家情人節快樂！～＊ 天下文壇 天下文壇 寒鴉 2005-01-14 23:50 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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| 回覆： | 數日追思告別式後,剛返來 | 第 8 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-15 02:14
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數日追思告別式後,剛返來 摘自 天下文壇 子雁 2005-01-15 02:14 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl 這是一首即興有感塗鴉, ...沒押韻,也不熟押韻法. 感謝二位的誠心指引.我目前還彌留在當時的情境狀態,要些時日再回頭看. ~前段,說的是:lost, 後段, 說的是:found ~descending 是有種negative mood .改"transcending"吧 ~neverthless, wish you all ...HAPPY VALENTINE !! 笑一笑~哈利波特! 天下文壇 天下文壇 子雁 2005-01-15 02:14 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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| 回覆： | 第 9 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-15 11:16
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摘自 天下文壇 子雁 2005-01-15 11:16 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl The Amazing Love As the clouds searching in the air, The water empties its sleeves; The sun has no words to tell, Fixing the core, not leaving alone. It was the voice of the solitude, Deepening the sea's original soul; Transcending, mirroring, then both found, The blessed, Amazing Love! 天下文壇 天下文壇 子雁 2005-01-15 11:16 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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| 回覆： | For your reference only.(This way will sound better) | 第 10 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-24 14:23
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For your reference only.(This way will sound better) 摘自 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-24 14:23 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl * For your reference only. The Amazing Love As the clouds searching in the air, The water empties its sleeves. The sun has no words to tell, [color=blue:b68f4dc645]Not leaving alone, fixing the core. [/color:b68f4dc645] It was the voice of the solitude, Deepening the sea's [color=blue:b68f4dc645]lonely[/color:b68f4dc645] soul. Transcending, mirroring, [color=blue:b68f4dc645]and then[/color:b68f4dc645] both found. The blessed, Amazing Love! .................................................................................. The Amazing Love As the clouds searching in the air, The water empties its sleeves; The sun has no words to tell, Fixing the core, not leaving alone. It was the voice of the solitude, Deepening the sea's original soul; Transcending, mirroring, then both found, The blessed, Amazing Love! :arrow: 天下文壇 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-24 14:23 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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漢語在線 ~ 迴風小築 ~ 相逢即有緣，給您最大的祝福 ... |
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| 回覆： | 謝謝畢版版~改的好,的確順多了! 用"aching soul" 如何 | 第 11 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-24 16:03
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謝謝畢版版~改的好,的確順多了! 用"aching soul" 如何 摘自 天下文壇 子雁 2005-01-24 16:03 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl The Amazing Love As the clouds searching in the air, The water empties its sleeves. The sun has no words to tell, Not leaving alone, fixing the core. It was the voice of the solitude, Deepening the sea's aching soul. Transcending, mirroring, and then both found. The blessed, Amazing Love! 天下文壇 天下文壇 子雁 2005-01-24 16:03 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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| 回覆： | 第 12 樓 |
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時間：2005-01-25 00:03
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摘自 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-25 00:03 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl 子雁詞長好！ 用 aching soul 當然可以。不過，僅是個人淺見，因句首用 Deepening ，如果接 aching 好像不很順。孤獨寂寞才會想 有伴，如果是 痛覺 情緒反映可能是躲開逃避吧！？ 或者用悲傷或流浪或其他可以接受安撫的情緒 ....， wandering? or others .... It was the voice of the solitude, Deepening the sea's wandering soul. Transcending, mirroring, and then both found. The blessed, Amazing Love! :arrow: 天下文壇 天下文壇 畢泠 2005-01-25 00:03 http://yuhsia.com/ccb/index.pl |
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漢語在線 ~ 迴風小築 ~ 相逢即有緣，給您最大的祝福 ... |
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